Anyways, to keep this short, my brother ended up taking his time coming over and after all my packing it was close to dinner time. We decided that we would go to a local Mexican restaurant to eat. The lighting is a bit dim upon entering. There is a small room with several tables and a wall lined with booths. Three or four stairs lead up to a bar and another wall of booths. I can never figure out if you are supposed to seat yourself or wait for some one to seat you as there is no defined host/hostess station and there are always so many empty tables. Today we decided to seat ourselves at a booth on the main floor. We were soon greeted by a young man who mumbles and could barely be heard above the loud Mexican music blaring overhead. He gave us our menus and left. After he had gone I leaned over towards my brother and said, "I always find the waiters and waitresses here a bit odd." Upon saying this I see that our waitress was only one table over from where we were sitting and may have heard what I said even though I was sure the loud music would have made that difficult.
Throughout the meal I kept feeling this little nudge from within that I needed to apologize for what I had said. Whether the waitress had heard what I had said or not was not the point. I knew that my comment had not honored the men and women working there nor had it honored God. I kept waiting for the right moment halfway hoping that if I waited long enough the feeling of needing to apologize would subside and give me permission to leave things as they were. This, however, did not happen. Our check had been delivered and I still had not apologized. My brother kindly paid for both our meals, and still I waited. His card was returned and our waitress asked if we needed anything else. This was the moment! But did I take it? Nope. She walked away to another table to refill the drinks.
The need to apologize was still there urging me forward. As she moved away from the other table I managed to catch her eye and saying her name asked if I could talk to her for a moment. This time I was able to get out the word that I felt the need to say throughout the whole meal. I apologized for the words I had said about the staff (as it turns out she did not hear what I had said). She assured me that there were no hard feelings and said there was no need to apologize. I knew that even though she had not required it of me, God had.
The words we say have value. We can either use our words to add value to others or use them to try and take away a person's value. In the statement I had made about the staff being a bit odd, I was not adding value, I was taking it away. I thank God for this lesson in humility. I am so grateful that He loves me enough to correct me and gently guide me towards a more Jesus centered life.
